Well you guys which spend a lot of time hearing your female friend which you have a crush on talking about her fights with her boyfriend into the wee hours of the morning...

Supposedly. That's a good move. HOWEVER(econs kicking in again)

The next step is where guys always fumble.

Take a seat with me. Well you hear the girl complain. Did you ever ask yourself why is she telling you? Well there's only 3 rational answers. 1 you're comforting to talk to. 2 you're always giving the right advice. 3 she puts her trust in you.

Note: Girls if we do listen to your problems over the phone...It's just something that every guy does. And sometimes we just love hearing your sweet voices. All I get on the phone nowadays is "eh King you want supper can go out now" from a Bird.

IF it's situation 1&3 those positions are called advantageous. Duh. So how do people screw it up?

She trusts you and thinks you're comforting. But then you start telling her YOUR problems. Whoops? Yes. You're pretty much the image of a problem free life as long as you're keeping quiet. But then when you start to tell her your problems. You kinda shake her trust and confidence in you. If the problems are big. It means you have an unstable life yourself. If they're small it means you can't handle them.

Oh you're going to ask about why does the sharing continue even then? Everyone pretty much makes their problems seem a lot worse then they are actually. By telling her your problems...You kinda make your own world look worse than hers. Well girls pretty much look to their man as a pillar of strength. So all girls have this buff image of their boyfriends in their mind. Pretty much as if he's a God among men which doesn't seem to have a single problem shaking his boat. If you solve her problems right but you present your own problem...Do you seem like that kinda guy?

And also...*cough* hint hint *cough* dude...You're not going to get the girl by agreeing to her every whim and fancy. You become the doormat that way. To her it'll seem like you're a nice guy which doesn't have much of a spine. So be the nice guy with the spine and don't give in to everything. Have some self respect.

Hearing Beatrice and Yiyun talk about their boyfriends sometimes you get the feeling that they idolise them. Men full of confidence and valour and honour with a huge estate. Uhh...well apart from the huge estate...These guys have some serious confidence(not cockiness) and honour in them. And it's attractive to the opposite sex.

Confidence and manners. Attractive stuff. You'd like to see it in your girlfriends wouldn't you guys? Same thing for the girls. Except that girls place a higher value in it.

So whats the nice guy supposed to do? Honestly...I'm not 100% sure.

No top player can really tell you either. Joel doesn't know either. No one knows.

Because it varies with the hand you wanna hold at the end of the day.

However(econs lagi!) Jorrel once said that "getting a girlfriend isn't something that completes your life. You should already have a complete life before getting into a relationship and a girlfriend is just a new form of joy in your already abundant life."

More or less lah.

Thats a solid nugget of golden information from the master sweet tongue himself with girls lining up for his golden smile. So instead of trying to fix yourself up with a nice sweet girl...Shouldn't you be off on your own fixing your own life?

Oh wait you're probably gonna ask me where I got all this. My citations? Ask my friends. Everyone has had a hand in this. Even my relatives have said something over the years. Look I don't ask. They just ask me why I'm single and dish out some advice.

Oh so you're going to ask if any of this is true? I'll give you my best opinion on the above. Yes.

And you're probably gonna ask from what stand point am I making these claims. Why I'm still single even when I know all this. *cough* there's a reason really...Not telling anyway.

So whats it take to have a nice long proper relationship? Emotionally stable, Confident, Wit and Intelligence.

And forget being a jerk.