The Bite
Chimy Changa

Christmas carol parodies

By Kington
---------------(Jingle bells tune)--------------
Jingle bells, Jingle bells,
Santa is gonna hang,
If he gives another shit,
About how bad I was. HEY!
---------------------------(Jingle bells tune)-------------------------
Santa's balls, Santa's balls,
Some are big,
Some are small,
Hanging from his baggy sleigh. HEY!
Big one 50 cents,
Small one 20 cents,
If you want the biggest one,
it's just 2 ringgit. HEY!
------------------------(Rudolph the red nosed reindeer tune)----------------------
Rudolph the red nose reindeer,
Had a very shiny nose,
It was very oily,
Some even said it glowed.
------------------------ (Rudolph the red nosed reindeer tune) -----------------------
Hello, Mr Christmas buffet,
I'm hear to pig out,
Fighting with all the chinese aunties,
I'll make sure I'll get it all.
Santa's coming for christmas cheer,
And to steal the food,
So make it's sure it's bloody gone,
Even before he gets here. HEY!
 

Oh, the irony of it all.

By Kington
In life we tend to get a lot of irony. But I guess some of us just dismiss it nowadays thinking it's normal.

So lets start with the most common.

1.Piercings. No offense ya Mar-xha.

Piercings one's ears last time was and indication that the woman was married. Nowadays it's just cosmetic. *Cough* 14 alot *cough* (I still think it's cool so if you ever do read this don't get offended. I still love you buddy.)

2.Weapons were developed to maim and kill. But generally the nations who are most interested in conquering by maiming and killing are very good in the art of healing.
Take sparta for example. Lots of soldiers. Good at conquering. Had a lot of doctors.

Oh yeah now there are talks of making non lethal weapons for crowd suppression.......

3.Things also tend to go forwards then backwards too.

When people first started making cars. They kept making the engines bigger for more go.
Now they wanna make them smaller and milk more power out of them.

4.Smoking is quite ironic too. Smoking kills more people indirectly than guns yet people still buy ciggies. Some people even GIVE ciggies to FRIENDS.
Assisted suicide.

5.There's a "safety catch" on a gun. Need I say more?

6. God made weed, man made beer.

(We also made all the other drugs too.)

7. Suicide is killing yourself. Killing someone else is murder. But nowadays there's assisted suicide.

8. Most Malaysians believe that the other person is actually on the way when they say that they're on the way.
Reality: Fella's at home about to take a shower or smth.

9. You take baths and when ur all squeeky clean out of the shower you dry yourself on a towel. You wash the towel eventually.

10. Some students can't wait to get to working and leaving the studying world. Working people keep telling us to cherish our non working years. We come out experience work and condemn them for not making it sound serious enough.

11. Ang morhs(white men) come to asia to get a tan. Asians wanna get fairer.

Brain not working too well at the moment. Most ironies are quite specific anyway. So I'll let it simmer for awhile.
 

World of Wars Part 2

By Kington
Sunday, December 17th 20th century of the Obsidian King, (2006)

Multi Suffix and Prefix King.


I've change my residence back to my old home.

The one which was given to me when I received my suffix.

Torment Over None.

We're doing pretty well in this war. Even if it is just for sport.

The Odyssey War.

Only Odysseuses are allowed to participate in this game.

The name of this war refers to the travels of Odysseus after the trojan war.

Likewise we travel in this game far and wide.

But unlike the greek epic. We're allowed any means of travel and the goal is not to reach Ithaca but to capture as many territories in 10 years with only a team of oddesyeuses.

We are men and woman who have forsaken enough of our humanity to achieve powers that ordinary men only dream of in novels and fairy tales.



Odysseus' main heroic trait is his mētis, or "cunning intelligence"; he is often described as the "Peer of Zeus in Counsel". This intelligence is most often manifested by Odysseus' use of disguise and deceptive speech. His disguises take forms both physical (altering his appearance) and verbal,

All of us have it. But yet some of us have it more than others.

This war is going to last 10 years. Which is the time limit anyway.

Because were such a rare occurence, from the world's population of 6.1 billion there's only 100 of us in each team.

As leader of the DarkHats team I have to control my emotions to lead them.

What a strange war it is. The use of Oracles in this war makes things oddly predictable yet erratic. Played out in another world called the Epic Voyage.

The ten years is measured by a clock in the real world back on earth that will slowly tick off every second of this 10 years.

The oddest thing about the world is it was built without humans just for this game of ours. There's no sun. Making energy supplies, food supplies and Dark vision gifts all the more important.

We're also not allowed to attack or try to capture any regions within 5pm to 6am in the real world. That means we can leave and head home within those hours. And sieges have a maximum time of 11 hours.

But that doesn't really matter because my team can capture a continent in 6 hours.

Bless our technologically advanced weaponry.

Because of the lack of numbers everyone is afraid of losing even one man.

We're not allowed to even attack each other outside of the Epic Voyage. No assasination attempts.

Compared to the Obsidian War.

I have to steady myself for my men. I have to cast my emotions aside.

To do my best. In waging this war.

 

World of Wars Part 1

By Kington
Thursday, December 14th 20th century of the Obsidian King, (2006)

Multi Suffix and Prefix King.

I hate. It.

I've survived wars. Centuries. Civilisations.

Hardened my heart. Removed it. Replaced it. Enough to topple competitors and proclaim myself the finest.

I am immortal now. Or pretty close.

But yet. With no heart I still succumb to be a victim of love.

This rare feeling that no one can explain. Philosophers debate it's existance and it's purpose in the continuity of our people.

Scientists study it they understand the chemicals involved. But can't reproduce it.

The world is democratic. Every last dictatorship has fallen. Even I have given up my throne because I hated to rule.

Living as one of ordinary men the race of us immortals have long been forgotten. I met her.

Years ago. She still breathes. She still walks. She still rejects me.

I still contemplate it. I can make no move on it. One of the world's finest strategists can't even handle his own love affairs. Embarrassing.

Ah. A knock. It's time to begin.

The last gift from her. A picture of us. Taken as a memento for the time we've spent together.

It's time I leave it I think. For good.

My men need me to win.

I open the door. And aides stream in. Bringing files, equipment, charts, graphs, maps, specimens and everything and anything that I may need.

They don't say anything seeing my expression. They know better.

It's time. To continue, the games.

And hopefully I'll win this time. But I have to get rid of it.

I can't have it now.
 

Prom night 2006

By Kington
Lack luster.

The food sucked.

But it was a touching moment for most of us. The last time most of us are gonna ever be together.

I didn't really take too many pics that night but I don't really mind la. Just having pictures from other people is good enough for me.

Oh yeah send me ANY pics please.

Lyrics for the prom video:

Please don't cry
You know I'm leaving here tonight
Before I go I want you to know
that there will always be a light

And if the moon had to runaway
And all the stars didn't wanna play
Don't waste the sun on a rainy day
The wind will soon blow it all away, ya

So many times I planned
To be much more than who I am
And if I let you down
I will follow you 'round until you understand

That if the moon had to runaway
And all the stars didn't wanna play
Don't waste the sun on a rainy day
The wind will soon blow it all away, ya, oh ya

When the days all feel the same
Don't feel the cold or wind or rain
Everything will be okay
We will meet again one day
[ these lyrics found on http://www.completealbumlyrics.com ]
And I will shine on, for everyone

So please don't cry
Although I leave you here this night
Where I go how far I don't know
But I will always be your light

That if the moon had to runaway
And all the stars didn't wanna play
Don't waste the sun on a rainy day
The wind will soon blow it all away, ya, oh ya

When the days all seem the same
Don't feel the cold or wind or rain
Everything will be okay
We will meet again one day
I will shine on, for everyone
Shine on, for everyone
When the stars all look the same
Don't feel the cold or wind or rain
Everything will be okay
We will meet again one day
I will shine on, for everyone
Shine on, for everyone


I feel so touchy now. I'll miss you guys but I don't know if you'll miss me.

Sniff.

Goodbye friends.
 

Tag.

By Kington
Layer ONE : On the Outside

Name : Lee Kington

Birth Date : 28th Sept 1989

Current Status : Grumpy like 1 of the seven dwarfs.

Eye color : Light shade of brown.

Hair Color: Black as a pit.

Righty or Lefty : Right but I use my left for a lot of other things. Including brushing teeth.

Zodiac Sign : Libra. Who said I'm injustice?


Layer TWO : On the inside

Your Heritage: Chinese.

Your Fears : God. Fear him and fear no other. Because if God ever abandons you. It's the worst thing that could happen.

Your Weaknesses : Paranoid SoB. I also tend to get very testy over small things. And I tend to let people trample over me by being too nice.

Your Perfect Pizza : Cheese, Meat, Ham, Bacon and a friend to eat it with.


Layer THREE : Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow

Your thoughts first waking up : What do I do today?

Your Bedtime : 12-3 am

Your most missed memory : The days where I used to have fun with my friends.


Layer FOUR : Your Pick

Pepsi or Coke : Pepsi. Less gas.

McDonald's or Burger King : Mcdee. The beef in burger king is darn strong and it's expensive too.

Single or group dates: Never had any. But definately a single date. More romantic and no distractions.

Adidas or Nike: Nike. Never had an addidas.

Lipton tea or Nestea: Lipton. Kington. Lipton. Duh.

Chocolate or vanilla: Mixed.

Cappuccino or coffee: Coffee. Cappuccino dahm strong la.


Layer FIVE : Do you

Smoke : No. I wanna be able to see my grandkids.

Curse : Like a sailor. Especially when I'm annoyed. But I try to limit myself in front of girls.

Layer SIX : In the Past Month

Drank alcohol: Quite a lot. But not as much till it's something really bad. Once every few weeks.

Gone to the mall: Quite often mostly with parents. But now I'm looking for excuses to go. (hint)

Been on stage: Acting. Then again, Life is a stage and everyone is an actor.

Eaten sushi: A lot.

Dyed your hair: My dad said too poofy so I'm not allowed to.


Layer SEVEN: Have You Ever?

Played a stripping game: Once. Quit while I was a ahead was boring anyway. All guys.

Changed who you were to fit in: Too much. Change my style now. I don't care if I ever fit in anymore. Part of life is in being special.


Layer EIGHT

Age you're hoping to be married : In 15 years time preferrably 27-30. Or whenever I find the time is right.


Layer NINE: In a Girl/Guy.

Best eye colour: Don't look at it.

Best hair colour: I don't care. But I prefer people who are proud of their natural assets.

Short or long hair: Long I guess. But I'm not really that shallow. Love is blind.


Layer TEN: What Were You Doing.

1 minute ago : Before I started I was talking to Henry and Yi Ching.

1 hour ago : Sleeping.

4.5 hours ago : Helping John Hans do the prom video.

1 month ago : Watching old bond flicks and studying.

1 year ago : Working for Dad and doing a whole lot of other stuff. Mostly boring stuff waiting for the holiday to end.


Layer ELEVEN : Finish The Sentence

I love: Nothing much. Can't think of anything.

I feel: Tulan. Don't wanna say why.

I hate: FFKers. People who don't keep any promises and those fellas that always promise you things to last a dahm long time but they leave you at the corner.

I hide: The stuff I use to make presents for my friends.

I miss: The good old days when nothing mattered.

I need: Some loving? To get out with friends la I guess.


Layer TWELVE : Tag 5 people

difficult 1.

Mike.
Sue?
Yi Ching?
E-yan?
Henry?

Don't know many people who blog nor read this.
 

IT'S THE AM BABY

By Kington
SPM IS SOOOOOOOOOO OVER.

OH YES!!!!!

Celebrations are happening all this week all over the country.

But first some of us have to get a few habits out of the way:

1. Waking up at 6 in time for school or to study a bit more.
2. uhhhhhhhh I can't really remember what other bad habits are there coz spm is over and poof my mind went off the hook there.

Anyway yeah so yesterday was basically about chilling out.

We got to 1U at 4:30 yesterday me, wei yew and daniel hon. So we went to times and we ended up reading "PC gamer" while waiting for joel. Although he said he was coming it took him 20 mins to get there. Not a Tua. Whee.

Then we met up with the penyu and the chinaman at starbucks. Penyu being penyu was late. Then we sucked coffe at starbucks. Before playing pool all the while cursing.

They cursed "Kington gets all the easy shots dahm lucky."
I cursed "If yiyun doesn't come I'm gonna rape that bitch" and "I'm freaking hungry can we eat yet???!!!"

Eventually yiyun came and we went to nandos for dinner then we pretty much just walked around after that till we met up with chee hoe and went to the batting cages.

Then me and Li Yan split off from them and I went shopping with her after I detoured to the toilet. When I came back I decided she had enough people to keep her company so I went to look for Emily. After I said my "hi"s and "goodbye"s I walked back to padini and there yiyun told me to look for another ride home. So I had to run all the way back to Emily and ask her for a ride home.

Made it. Barely. She was waiting for a collegue to get back from the toilet and when I got there turns out the collegue was just coming out of the toilet. Score.

After that came home watched tv. Whee.

----------------------------------------------------

I've spent the earlier part of today wondering where the hell was a friend of mine. It was the hols after all and the fella should be online. Then I noticed I deleted her off my friends list but didn't block her.

Oh mystery of the missing contact solved.

I don't think I'm gonna ever add the person back to my list anyway. No fun in that. :[
 

Closure

By Kington
December 4th.

The end of the begining and the begining of the end.

I leave school to pursue higher education. 1 Month of nothing. Only seeing people when I want to.

It's time to take life off it's hinges examine it.

Give it a fresh coat of paint. Relearn everything. Reach out and grab new things. And not to forget pick up all the ties which I've let go.

1 Busy holiday. Once I get the bio nailed down first.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

Where are you guys going anyway for college? Which intake and course?

Would really help in me making a decision.
 

Moving...

By Kington
The cries and shouts were getting louder and louder.
The cacophony of the sounds was so intense.
Full of emotions, - I could feel them and hear them!
Then, I woke up, bathed in sweat, cold sweat.
I just sat there immobile on my tattered bed, breathing in the musty smells of the room.
I listened to the sounds of cars passing by my house.

Such horrifying dreams plague me night after night.
Even on the days I don't have any of those dreams I'm awoken by strange noises.
The sounds of chairs dragging.
The sudden sound of the tap running.
Yet with my paltry income I knew I had to put up with this.

So every night I endured the those horrors.
Eventually I went for counselling to find out about these horrific dreams.
The counsellor merely gave me the inconclusive theory that it may be a manifestation of my inner hatred towards something and gave me some drugs.

Finally, I resumed proper sleep.
The furniture continued to shift around though but it didn't bother me too much anymore.
I neglected to mention about my sleepwalking to the doctor during my visits but I felt that I was pretty used to it.
On the very first day itself, I awoke to find myself in the living room asleep in a large wooden ornate chair.
This had happened quite a few times.
It was always the same.
I always woke up in that chair.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------

Truly Friends?


*BOOM BOOM*

*Followed by a span of silence that felt like a year but in fact only lasted about a second or so.*

But who's timing it?

*Klink Klink*

The shell casings hit the floor. Followed by an unending silence.

The attacker holsters his gun and takes a seat on a bench near enough to see the body. My body.

"It's perfectly safe to touch him you know? All I wanted was to knock him off. Go on weep or something. He's your friend after all."

No one stirs. Nothing happens just endless moments of silence. Some people run off to get the security others shield their eyes from looking at the body and many others turn to examine the killer.

He's wearing a funny coat with markings on it and most notably stripes on his shoulders. With a young face with deep eyes and blood red tinted sunglasses which seem to have sparks flowing around in the lenses. Slick combed back hair and shiny black leather shoes. He was tall and lean. And he certainly didn't look like he could have carried off what he had just done.

Pulling a gun at 10 metres firing 2 shots in under a second with dead on accuracy for the centre of the forehead and another to the heart.

No one looks at me. I can tell.

"You call yourself friends? There really isn't any of you that hasn't wished for him to be dead anyway. You'd break his heart if he found out."

*Mocking laugh*

"Ooooooo The air is pretty cold in here with a hint of celebration I guess you guys which call yourself his friends are actually glad to be rid of him. All those times where you felt he was strange, knew too much, was too nosy, too annoying. Such a pity."

His eyes darts to my body. People are screaming and backing away. No one has touched my body for 20 minutes and suddenly they're all backing away faster than I would expected for them to come and tend to my body.

The murderer merely looks on.

2 Hands made entirely of mental flare, I use, looking like disembodied hands made of sparks with a ball of flame in the palm. I go for the heart first pulling out the bullet and sealing the chambers. I leave the wound open. I don't have enough energy to close it.

I pull the bullet out and close the wound in my head. I'm going to need that.

I don't need the hands anymore. I can use my own hands.

I get up and head over to him. He isn't shocked but he is certainly surprised.

I hear the gasping but thats not going to stop me. He draws the gun again. He takes a few more shots at me but my inner fire burns the bullets distorting their direction.

I grab him and fling him bodily into a bench. I pick him up.

"Closest thing to immortal. Yeah, thats you. My name is Everich Mackeler from the Virulence. Just here to prove it to you again."

I fling him into a wall and he passes out cold immeadietly.

Feeling my eyes begining to burn.

But yet not from my powers. I feel my strenght draining. The strenght that makes me more than just human. It's something else.

I turn to these people whom I call my friends, tears begining to flow.

I take a deep breath.

"WHY!!!???"

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Lazy to moderate 2 blogs need I say more?